My dad passed away 4 years ago. I was going to write a few words about it yesterday but I had a really bad day and didn’t feel like it. Today’s not much better.
Four years since my mom’s passing. It still hasn’t gotten easier.
My Mom passed away exactly three years ago. Hope she’s in a better place.
As some of you may know, I’ve been depressed for almost a year now. These past few months have been a rollercoaster of emotions, from intense anger for no apparent reason, through unexplainable happiness, to complete and utter indifference.
At one point in time, not so long ago, I had planned to start writing daily, but I couldn’t bring myself to focus on Infinite Diaries as much as I wanted to. Part of the reason behind this was that I was depressed after both my parents succumbed to cancer in March and April of this year, just 20 days apart. Actually that’s probably the main reason, with laziness being the other. Or lack of motivation perhaps. Nevertheless, I wasn’t doing what I had been planning to do for the past year. And then I went to Rome …
Both my parents lost their fight with cancer. My mom—I wrote about here already—died 118 days ago, my dad followed her 20 days later. I still think about them every single day, wishing they were still alive. Not a single hour goes by without them being in my thoughts.
I’m not alone in life, yet I often feel that I am. I’m have no clue why that is. I miss them terribly, and I would have given up anything and everything for them not to have suffered. I’m still depressed. Trying to sort out my feelings. My life. Get my thoughts in order. Nothing’s helping. That’s why I’ve been writing so little. I wonder when life will be easier.
It probably won’t.
Spend time with your loved ones. You’ll regret it later if you don’t. Trust me on this one.
My mom passed away 70 hours ago. I still cannot comprehend that I will never see her again.
The first cancer attacked her body fourteen years ago and she fought it off after a few weeks of intensive radiotherapy. I’m not actually sure how long it took now, but it seemed an eternity to me back then. She also had the lymph nodes in her right arm removed as well as part of her breast. She spent the next few years taking various pills and had regular scans—all was well in the world. After ten years her doctor told her that the chances for her cancer returning were practically zero.
He was wrong.